"She won’t respond"

Photo Credit: Pete Linforth (Pixabay)

You may have heard a strange sound last Friday….. I did…. that was the collective groan and rolling of eyes when people saw Friday Thoughts was back in their mailbox…… thanks for the responses and encouragement!

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“No, no - nothing like that. The project went well and we got along just fine. I just don’t think I made enough of a connection to bother her”

These were pretty run-of-the-mill training sessions for a professional services firm…. Bring the high-performing senior managers together for a week -  nice hotel, nice meals… exposure to leadership…. networking and training. Typically the training highlights building client relationships, developing opportunities, etc., etc., etc…  the normal stuff…

Don’t get me wrong, this is all good – just not extraordinary……. One year we added something small that turned out to be a big deal. Charlie Green (Trusted Advisor) suggested we ask each participant to send a short 4 question survey to 2 or 3 clients with whom they had worked with in the last year…..and to send the emails before they left the session that day.

Mark, came to the front of the room very concerned

“I’ve been on a big project for 9 months – so I really just have one client”

“What about your project before that?”

“That was a long time ago – there was one executive–but we didn’t work that closely together”

“No problem, just send it and see what happens”

With a very worried expression…. “she won’t respond, she won’t respond… and I don’t want to bother her”

“I don’t understand, was there a problem on the project?  Or did the two of you have an issue or  conflict?”

“No, no - nothing like that. The project went well and we got along just fine. I just don’t think I made enough of a connection to bother her”

“Is there a downside to sending it? It’s just a short email – she can just delete it.

“I don’t know …. “

“Unless there is some big risk to you or the firm I say just send it.  If she doesn’t answer – it’s ok - happens all the time. But it’s totally up to you.”

He walks away and I did not think much about it.

The next morning before the session started Mark came up with his laptop and emphatically said,  “Read this !”

Fearing the worst I leaned down and read…..

“Mark

So great to hear from you – it has been too long. I would be happy to do the survey, but only under one condition – you come by and see me in the next couple weeks. We are thinking about expanding the quality program you led for us and I think we could use your help.” 

With a big smile on his face – “Maybe I underestimated my connection”

Mark was not the exception –  over and over we found senior managers were significantly underestimating the relationships they have developed. 

It’s a pattern I still see – with senior managers, Partners…. and frankly myself.

Why am I always surprised when I hesitatingly reach out to a former client and hear “So great to hear from you – it’s been a long time”?? What’s wrong with me….

There is this persistent, pernicious voice in our head telling us our client is busy, or she does not want to be bothered, or he was not impressed by the project, or our connection was not that good….. and almost always that voice is wrong – very wrong.

Why does that matter?  It causes many of us to miss two powerful ways to build our consulting careers:

1. “Never let go of a client” – I don’t remember who told me this – probably my tormentor Bob.  Thirty years ago he implored me to stay in touch with all my clients – whether I was doing work for them or not. He likened it to compounding interest…. looking back I now wish I had been more diligent following his counsel….  
   

2. Using references – It’s so simple – just include the name and email address of a couple of former clients in every proposal – especially when it is not required. (of course only with the former client’s permission) Over the years I have been amazed:

   1. How effective this is in a competitive situation, 

   2. How rarely it is used, and 

   3. So many people hesitate to do it because “they don’t want to bother the client”

There is a frequently quoted data point from Dale Carnegie research - “91% of customers say they’d give referrals, but only 11% of sales people ask for referrals.”  Such a massive missed opportunity…..

The simple fact is we did great work for that client, they appreciated the work, they would be thrilled to hear from us and would be happy to provide a reference….

I think I need to set aside some time next week and reach out to a few people I haven’t talked to in a long time… 

Just a few thoughts….

Walt