Live Interview with Elon Musk
Can he reinvent Twitter ?
In Friday Thoughts’ boundless quest to create new heights of journalistic excellence and provide our highly esteemed readers with the absolute best in investigative journalism, we are bringing you this week the world’s first exclusive interview with Elon Musk.
FT: Elon – thank you for joining us !!
EM: Thank you, thank you – my pleasure – wait - where am I? what is this?
FT: A live interview with Friday Thoughts readers
EM: Friday Thoughts – what is that!?
FT: A very exclusive and esteemed set of business leaders that receive the amazing Friday Thoughts newsletter.
EM: How many readers do you have?
FT: 25 or 30 …. Including my family
EM: That’s amazing 25 million readers – I am surprised I have not heard of you.
FT: well, uh… yes…
EM: But this is a blog post, how do you do a “live” interview on a blog post
FT: We use a new crypto metaverse web3 technology!!
EM: and your readers will believe that??
FT: well, like I said the world’s most esteemed business leaders…
EM: Right …… Is Joe Rogan going to be here?
FT: no, I don’t think so….
FT: Now could we talk about your purchase of Twitter……
EM: Oh, you want to talk about THAT??
FT: Yes, first, this morning you tweeted that the deal was on pause… that seems to be another twist or some would say stunt….
EM: Look, I need to understand the volume of Twitter’s troll and fake accounts – It’s called due diligence….
FT: yes, but …
EM: by the way I noticed Friday Thoughts is on Twitter – is that a real account ?
FT: It’s real – just like our crypto metaverse web3 technology….
FT: Let’s back up - given all the amazing things you have going on, why did you decide to focus on a a social media platform??
EM: Honestly, I am bored. I have revolutionized the auto industry, solar industry and space travel – we will have a colony on Mars this fall. I needed something new to do….
FT: I am not sure “colony” is the right word to use these days…..
EM: Is this going to be one of those woke interviews – do I need to identify as an African American to satisfy your woke requirements?
FT: No I don’t think that is necessary……
EM: I bet you are big supporter of paper straws…. Hey - where is Joe Rogan ?
FT: Joe isn’t coming…. Now since you announced your purchase of Twitter all hell has broken loose…..
EM: Yes, some people seem to be against free speech
FT: Well that – but also the stock market is crashing, Netflix stock is in the gutter….cryptocurrencies are crashing…….
EM: I don’t think I had anything to do with that…..
FT: There are baby formula shortages…. What do you have against babies?
EM: wait a minute….
FT: the war in the Ukraine…..and now the Supreme Court is in turmoil……
EM: That’s not even remotely related…..
FT: and Will Smith slapped Chris Rock…..
EM: that was before I even announced my bid….
FT: I think we can agree it has had a very big impact on the world…..
EM: I don’t think…
FT: Hold on - We have a caller from Florida
EM: wait this isn’t even live – what the Heck?
Caller: Elon, I’m a very big fan, I’ve always been a big fan…. Actually, your biggest fan ever
EM: who is this?
Caller: I was a fan before anybody knew who you were…. And Elon – thanks for reinstating me on Twitter. I’m glad I was able to convince you to buy Twitter
EM: President Trump? Wait, we never talked about me buying Twitter
Caller: We don’t have to talk Elon – we both know genius billionaires have superpowers…
Caller: It was very unfair what they did to me on Twitter – very unfair
Caller: especially since I invented Twitter – I had the best Tweets –that’s what a lot of people are saying….. my Tweets were the best Tweets.
Caller: someone came up to me recently and said, “Sir, your tweets are the very best, they saved the world, actually the Universe”
Caller: will you be reinstating me soon?
EM: well, yes, I am all for free speech
Caller: I’m not so sure it should be free – we could make some money with this….
EM: Would you be interested in investing? I could use say $3-4 billion
Caller: Would love to Elon – that’s pocket change – Unfortunately my taxes are being audited, I can’t really do anything while they are being audited
EM: OK – well you should shut down Truth Social or change the name to Trumpet - hahahahaha
Caller: I think we will be happy to just come back and dominate Twitter …..Twitter needs me
EM: We will be happy to have you back
Caller: I think you should kick Biden and Pelosi off – they are saying unfair things about me – very unfair - so much fake news
EM: that’s not what we were thinking
Caller: Can you add a big Sharpie function to Twitter – you know I invented Sharpies?
Caller: Is Joe Rogan joining this conversation ? I am his biggest fan….
FT: Thank you for calling in Mr. President
Caller: Are you cutting me off? Fox News doesn’t cut me off…..
FT: well, we have limited time
Caller: I’m a big fan of Friday Thoughts –no fake news on Friday Thoughts - your biggest fan actually – I love how you stick it to the liberals – they are so unfair…. I also love Fridays by the way – and Saturdays too – I’m not a fan of Mondays though – I don’t have many thoughts on Mondays….
FT: Thank you Mr. President!
EM: How did I get roped into a crypto interview ? Am I getting paid for this ?
FT: Sure – you get a free subscription to Friday Thoughts…
EM…. Ummmm
FT: There are rumors that you have several other new businesses launching
EM: Yes, I am going to start Elon University..
FT: that already exists – it was founded decades ago
EM: Really ? Well, I am starting a new southern food restaurant chain called “Musk-a-dine”
FT: That does not sound that interesting
EM: and a new fragrance – Musk Musk or Musk2
FT: Those don’t seem like good business ideas
EM: Aren’t you the same guy that tried to talk David Sacks out of joining Peter Thiel to start PayPal?
FT: It wasn’t quite like that….
EM: and then you told him not to make the “Thank You for Smoking Movie”
FT: actually…
EM: and then said no one needed Yammer – that was subsequently bought by Microsoft for $1B ?
FT: No, what I said was…. Let’s switch topics……let’s talk about the SEC
EM: I am not really a fan of college sports
FT: I mean the Securities and Exchange Commission
EM: They don’t have much of sense of humor
FT: People think you have been mocking the SEC
EM: No actually I don’t have to do that – they do it themselves
FT: Here is a recent quote attributed to you
The San Francisco office of the SEC were shameless puppets of Wall St shortseller sharks, while doing nothing to protect actual shareholders. That is why I lost all respect for them.
EM: What is your question? By the way could we get Joe Rogan to join us ?
FT: Ok changing topics again – you recently tweeted
“Chocolate milk is insanely good. Just had some. “
Was this a hint about the changes you are planning at Twitter?
EM: that’s a good idea
FT: You also tweeted “the elusive beauty of imperfection” – what does that mean ?
EM: It is obvious to those that get it – which clearly you don’t…… where is Joe ?
FT: can I just confirm a few facts?
FT: Tesla is the first new US auto company to go public since For in 1956.
EM: yes
FT: According to Bloomberg Tesla is among the 10 largest publicly-traded companies and is number one in growth the past 10 years with revenue increasing 260-fold to $54 billion;
EM: that sounds right
FT Number 1 in the past 12 months with sales growing 70%;
EM: yes
FT: Is top in share performance over five and 10 years with its stock appreciating 15- and 146-fold
EM: That might have changed a bit over the last few weeks – but that’s close
FT: And number 1 in employment growth - more than quintupling its workforce since 2016 to over 100,000 employees now.
EM: I think so….. and don’t forget about SpaceX
FT: The first reusable launcher and the first private space company to transport astronauts for NASA.
EM: yes
FT: OK, so you sold companies in 2000 and 2002 and invested that money 20 years ago into two companies that have redefined their industries…..
EM: yes
FT: With that track record, why should people believe that you can improve Twitter and make money?
FT: That’s all the time we have today Elon thanks for joining us
EM: are you rushing me out?
FT: Yes, we have Joe Rogan up next…..
Thoughts for a Friday…
Loved it!
Hahahaha. Love it!